Big Al and Elliott -- An Unexpected Friendship
Al Beatman, a resident of
Saint Mary Home,
lost his lifetime companion and best friend two years ago this August.
In the last months of his dear friend's life, Al devoted his time to
her care and wellbeing, often putting aside his own needs for hers.
After all, she was his best friend and that's what friends do.
When she passed away, Al was not only heartbroken, but also confronted
with empty days to fill. Friends of Al and staff members worried about
his grieving and were afraid he would retreat to a solitary life.
Elliott Kelbick, director of social services at Saint Mary Home,
visited regularly with Al after his friend's passing to see how he was
coming along and to encourage him to participate in group activities.
At first, Al was quiet and reserved, so Elliott suggested that moving
into a new room with a big easy chair might help Al's spirits; shortly
thereafter, Elliott found a small table for Al's telephone.
In time, Al began to open up to Elliott; they found out they both liked
watching UConn Women's basketball games and were both of the Jewish
faith. Al expressed how important his faith was to him, so Elliott made
arrangements for him to go to The McAuley and attend a Jewish service.
And this began a new friendship between a resident and a staff member.
Today, Elliott and Big Al (an affectionate name given to him by
his friends at Saint Mary Home) are the dearest of friends and visit
with each other almost daily. Each month, Elliott takes care of the
little things that are important to Big Al -- like turning over his
calendar pages and changing his clocks and watches.
No longer secluded in his room, Big Al is also quite popular
among his fellow residents -- he calls numbers for "Bottoms Up" and
plays the meanest game of checkers on the floor. When asked how they
feel about each other, in unison Elliott and Big Al replied, "He's my
best friend." Then, smiling at Elliott, Al concluded, "Good friends are
hard to find."
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